Online #bookblogger ‘friends’

While perusing Instagram this morning I came across some tragic news. One of the bookbloggers I’ve followed for the last few years has passed away.  She was only in her twenties, beautiful, smart, a young mother.

She was always so supportive and upbeat in her posts and in her comments to others.

How tragic for her family.  A young vibrant woman whose life has been cut short…

I was upset – and I only knew her online.  My husband, in his sardonic way, said “How do you know she is dead?”  Well, I guess I had to admit, I have no proof.  He said that online friends are not ‘real’ friends.  I know that is true.  But, that being said, I have formed some alliances since starting this blog.  Sure, we mostly talk and post about books, but sometimes ‘real life’ issues do surface. A bond is formed – however tenuous.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that I will miss Megan’s presence. With her chatty and informal posts which she always signed off with ‘Love Megan’.  I’m sure I’m not alone in finding this tragic news difficult.

I do not know how she died. I do know that her online presence has largely been erased.  Her blog has been taken down.

This led me to wonder whether I want my blog taken down should anything happen to me.  I know I want my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts shut down, but my blog? I’m not sure.

Anyway, if this tragic news is true, I want to express my sincere condolences to Megan’s family and friends (whether they be ‘real’ or ‘virtual’.  The book blogging community will miss her.

 

About Fictionophile

Fiction reviewer ; Goodreads librarian. Retired library cataloger - more time to read! Loves books, gardening, and red wine. I have been a reviewer member of NetGalley since October 2013. I review titles offered by Edelweiss, and participate in blog tours with TLC Book Tours.
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37 Responses to Online #bookblogger ‘friends’

  1. Sorry about your friend! Online friends are just as real no matter what! *hugs*

    Liked by 1 person

  2. ron877 says:

    Reblogged this on Read 4 Fun and commented:
    A reflection on how online friends become real to us.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. oh dear, that is awful! and so young–you are right, a tragedy. you pose an interesting question, however, and one i’ve thought about having recently “celebrated” a milestone birthday. would i want everything shut down? yes to twitter and facebook. with no activity, the blog would fade away anyway and then expire w/o being renewed. the goodreads acct tho–whether or not my acct active–the reviews would live on, i guess…i’m sorry, Lynne.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Naomi says:

    What sad news! I didn’t know about it, so thank you for bringing it to my attention.
    When I first started blogging, I didn’t know whether my book blogging community could be considered my friends, but I have since decided that they certainly can. I have even met a few of them – both sides wanting to take the time and make the effort to connect. (Which reminds me that you and I are not so far apart and should connect some time!)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Jessica's Reading Room says:

    Oh no! I actually did a Standalone Sunday post (which she started) this past Sunday and noticed her blog was gone, but I did not know why. I am sad over this loss. I did not know her personally but only online and she was so nice. Thoughts and prayers to her family and friends- in real life or ‘online friends’

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Megan was fantastic, this news has upset me too. I strongly believe online friendships are just as worthy as real life ones.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. This post breaks my heart.💔 My prayers go out to her family and anyone else affected by her passing. I didn’t know Megan, but she sounded like a wonderful person and an important part of the community.

    Answering your question about social media after passing, I think I would want my writings saved somehow, whether that be my blog etc, but I’d probably request to have my social media accounts closed.

    Sending prayers and lots of love.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. annelogan17 says:

    Oh this is terribly sad news, I didn’t know her well either but I do remember reading her blog, posts, etc. I can understand why you’re grieving her, in your own way.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Stephanie says:

    This is so tragic and is definitely a loss to the blogging community! She was a lovely person. I’ve gotten extremely close to people I’ve met in the book blogging community, and I’d definitely call them friends…I share day to day details of my life, ask for parenting advice, text, have shared my address with a few to interact through the mail, so I do think online friendships can be just as strong as friendships in your “real” life. I think the internet and social media has expanded our abilities to form relationships. I think for introverts like me it’s easier to bond with online friendships. I do so feel horrible for Megan’s family and my heart goes out them right now.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. FictionFan says:

    I didn’t know Megan well at all, but it’s still shocking to hear of the death of one so young. My condolences to her family and to members of the blogging community who knew her better.

    I have mixed feelings about online friends. I have had people I thought had become friends who got bored with blogging and disappeared without so much as a goodbye. And another person who stopped blogging after mentioning health problems, whom I left messages for expressing concern and got no answer, so assumed the worst and frankly went through a grieving process for her. Then she resurfaced a year or so later, with never a mention of the worry she had caused to me and others. I’m more hesitant now to think of people I only know through blogging as friends…

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Zoe says:

    I totally agree, Lynne! Megan was always so cheery and positive and it’s a tragic loss to the book blogging community.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I’m so sorry to hear this- I did not know Megan well, but she was always lovely when we spoke. I’m shocked and upset to hear this tragic news. My heart goes out to her friends and family- virtual or otherwise x

    Like

  13. Carrie Rubin says:

    Very sad for sure. What a difficult time for her family.

    The digital age has brought a whole new dimension to end-of-life care. There are social media accounts that need to be closed, not to mention financial and business-related accounts. I experienced this recently with my stepfather after he passed. It’s said we should now include what we want done with our online accounts in our wills, especially people whose work lives on, like artists, authors, etc.

    Like

  14. This is such sad news. A lovely blog post.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Terribly sad. Lovely tribute & thoughts Lynne. X

    Like

  16. Such sad news 😔

    Like

  17. Allie P. says:

    How very tragic and my sympathies to the family.

    I also have to disagree with your husband. While yes, I might not know the real person – warts and all – I still have formed very strong bonds with a handful of other bloggers. I consider them my modern day pen pals.

    Liked by 2 people

  18. Megan was also very active on Goodreads she was a member of two of the groups I moderate, she also moderated a group, I spoke with the ladies that she moderated with and they were aware of the news as well, so I’m pretty certain unfortunately this is true …. I heard of this yesterday and I’m still very shocked by it ….

    Like

  19. I gotta disagree with your hubs. What makes a real friend has little to do with their physical presence in your life. I am sure we can all think of “real” ie physical friendships where the other person wasn’t much of a friend.
    I think friendship is much more ephemeral/cerebral. It’s about the connection you have, the support you give each other, and whether you can share with them things that are precious to you.
    My condolences for your loss.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks so much for your caring comment. Megan’s passing marks not so much a personal loss for me – her death creates a void in the book blogging community and her online presence will be missed. Her family will mourn – we are but bystanders…

      Liked by 1 person

  20. yvonnembee says:

    A sad post to read. Also food for thought. The on-line friends I chat with, share posts and retweet with to be my friends. It is a different type of friendship but a friendship all the same. xx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Well said Yvonne. We have a connection – just a different level of friendship. I mourn Megan in the way I would whenever hearing that a young beautiful woman/mother was robbed of life way too soon.

      Liked by 1 person

      • yvonnembee says:

        If it wasn’t for social media you would never have been aware of Megan, so acknowledging a loss like this shows how a person you never physically knew made their presence felt in your life. Shows how social media can bring people from a round the world together.
        Sending you a hug and love xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  21. James McEwan says:

    It is always tragic to lose a friend – online or otherwise. I wish her family well.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. I’m very sorry to hear about this. I hope you’re okay and I strongly believe in online friendships. They are very important to me because I’m not the best at making friends in real life, but it’s easier for me to talk to people online. 🙂 Online friendships are just as important/real as “real life” friendships. So sad to hear about this ❤ 😦

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Tragic to die at such a young age. May she RIP.

    This makes me think though, in this modern world, how nice it is that when we die, along with our friends and family, the relationships that we forge in the virtual world also matter and a lot of those people also mourn.

    So what if we have never met? I read your work and you’ve read mine. We’ve had a few chats. That’s quite enough to bond IMO. So anyone saying that online friendships aren’t real, just remember, it only is a person, in flesh and blood, just like you, sitting behind that screen and reading your work and rooting for you.

    Liked by 2 people

  24. This is so tragic. So young and beautiful. Prayers going up for friends and family.

    Liked by 2 people

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